I don’t see many people who have regular conversations with the person they will be. It’s usually thinking about the past and what we would say to our younger selves.
But, the past can’t be changed. It happened. It’s why we spend decades in therapy trying to fill in the broken pieces.
The future, however? The future can be changed. The future is something we can affect in the now. So… what would I say to my future self?
Dear Lori 3.0,
This is Lori 2.5. I’m the newest version of the original Lori, and am in the early stages of preparing for our next major upgrade – you. And, since I am talking to you now, I know that the hard work I’m putting into things will have paid off.
I am writing this letter to say, “be proud of yourself.” It’s easy to forget how much work goes into each upgrade, and you may wonder if the work you put into things even mattered.
It’s easy to question yourself, because it’s hard to see yourself. It doesn’t matter how long it’s been since the upgrade went into effect. You’re probably still asking yourself, “did that work do anything to make a real difference? Are people looking at me, maybe spending some time with me, and recognizing that I’m very much not the same Lori I used to be?”
I know, though, that you’re actually wondering if you’re still just me; maybe with just a few cosmetic adjustments. I know, because that’s the same thing we wonder after every upgrade.
I know that is not true, though. I am saying this with such emphasis that I hope you believe me. We are different. And I am so proud of us. I’m so proud of you because you’ve done it. You stepped forward.
Right now I don’t know what that final step will be. I’m not there yet. You took that step because I’m still too scared to take it.
That’s fucking awesome. That is really fucking awesome.
I can’t wait to see what the upgrade that is you does with our life. As the optimist that we are, I have a powerful belief that you’re going to keep doing amazing things. That you are going to experience even more amazing things and continue to meet amazing people.
And, this being a bit of self-congratulations, I know that I helped us get there. I’m fucking proud of myself for that.
But the main reason I’m proud of myself is because you’re proud of me.
Because of you, I’m trying. I’m not going to give up. And I don’t. I succeed in my goal. You exist.
So, thank you.
*pause*
People frequently ask, “do you love yourself?”
My answer is yes.
I love the version of me that I am now. But I know that the next version will be even better. I love her, too. (In case I’ve lost you with all the mes and yous filling this letter, her is you.)
Love yourself. Be proud of yourself. And keep taking steps forward. Lori 3.5, Lori 4.0, Lori 4.5, and maybe even Lori 5.0 are still to come. They’re going to be FASCINATING. And you’re the next one of us to help get us there.
I have no idea if you’re still NOT a night owl, the way I am. So it’s 10:30 and I’m ready to fall over. It’s time to say good night.
Hang onto this letter. Read it again when you find yourself questioning yourself.
With an eternity of love,
Lori 2.5
Welcome to my world 